He walks into the dark room. It’s hard to see anything other than his shadow as it spans the floor. He shuts the door, careful not to let the light creep in. She pays no attention to him. But standing by the window starring at the rain, she grabs a quick glance at him from the corner of her eye.
Although she had been expecting him, she had secretly hoped he wouldn’t come. But at the end of the day, he was her only friend. And as a good friend, he not only listens to her, but offers her advice, and believes in her when she doesn’t want to believe in herself.
“Have you come to tell me ‘I told you so’?”
He puts his hands in his pockets and slowly takes a few steps towards her. He allows his head to drop and shake in disappointment, then lifts it up, tilts to the side and gives out a soft sigh. “I‘m just here to help.”
She tries hard to hold back the tears, but as hard as that was to do, it was harder to accept the fact that he did indeed tell her so. As much as she hated to admit it, he was always right. No matter how hard she tried to prove him wrong, she always ended up alone, empty…and wrong.
“We met in the rain, much like this one; remember?”
“Vaguely,” she lied. Truth was she remembered that evening as if it were yesterday. It was the first night that she felt helpless. The first time she had cut herself. Her first encounter with him. She was hurt, on the ledge of desperation, and in need of a shoulder to lean on. And there he was. Without uttering a single word, he sat beside her on the bench. As he gazed deep into her eyes, all the pain and loneliness she had felt, she saw in his eyes. And it was on the night at the park, that she shared a darkness in her with someone who knew how she felt - not just pretended like he knew, but truly felt her desperation.
She let him into her heart.
“No one will ever understand you like I do.”
She didn’t reply, but as her eyes twitched and she let a cigarette, she remembered that same night on the bench. They had talked about life, of love, boredom, lessons, dreams, pain and relief. Although he seemed dark and cynical, he was certainly knowledgeable. He always had the answers to everything.
“I‘m just so tired!” she admits as she quickly wipes a tear from her eyes.
He takes a few steps closer to her and places his hand on her shoulder as he softly whispers into her ears, “I know.” Placing both hands on each of her shoulders, he looks at her, “Why is it so hard for you to do the right thing?”
“Because it’s hard!” She exclaims.
“You know the right thing to do is always the hardest thing. You just have to have faith. Why do you keep putting yourself in the same situation? Take control of your life. Take a stand. Do what needs to be done.”
She’s still silent, starring at the rain through the window. A tear runs down her cheek.
He sits down at a table. “Let me help you.”
She turns around and heads towards the table where he sits. She grabs a chair on which the moonlight shines down upon, and sits in front of him. “Here…consider it a gift,” he says.
She lights another cigarette and takes a deep puff. As he gets up and walks towards the window, she stares at the table and what lies on it. He’s always been there for her, a good friend. Why stop trusting him now?
“You always believe in me when no one else does.”
She looks at him as he says, “that‘s what friends are for.” And slowly she places her cigarette on the ashtray.
A loud bang goes off and her body collapses on the table as blood from her head drips all over the table.
He says nothing. Does nothing. Lights a cigarette and expresses a cheeky smile as he passes her body and heads towards the door. “You know why they call me the Devil?” he asks rhetorically. “Because if you got things the wrong way around, Life Isn‘t Very Exciting Dear.”
He leaves…
skip to main |
skip to sidebar
Posts
3 comments:
**Warning may contain spoilers, read post first**
Analysis of Subai’s Untitled Through Request.
Subai sets the scene of her untitled short story right from the beginning. The darkness and eerie shadow of the male friend is depicted in a subtle ‘creep’-y manner. The quick clips presented to the reader regarding the male friend illustrates his intentions through the words used such as “creep”, “his hands in his pockets”, “tilts to the side”, all show his hidden agenda, the body language of a mischievous villain.
The struggle of one girl’s pain is later shown and depicted through the female protagonist short thoughts “she hated to admit it, he was always right…empty…and wrong.” The short quick thoughts of the female character allow the reader to enter her mind and feel the conflict within her. The use of words such as pain, loneliness, desperation and darkness all provide insight into the broken character, and act as a subtle hint to the reader about intentions of her male friend.
Subai uses imagery associated with the male friend to provide further hints to the reader about the true identity of the male character. The eerie environment surrounding him and the female character foreshadows her doom; the flame to light the cigarette, the smoke of the cigarette, the darkness of the room, and the chaotic noise of the rain all cleverly contribute to the real message hidden between the lines.
Subai then sharply twists the scene where the reader believes that the intentions of the male friend are pure because he wants her to do the right thing, but as later revealed this again contributes to the sly nature of the male character. Subai while providing sufficient information for the reader to find the true meaning of the plot, also cleverly tries to stir them away with the dialogue exchanged by the two characters.
Subai does indeed paint a cataclysmic scene with all its dark and shocking imagery, leaving the reader not only shocked but wanting to read it again to actually see the truth between the lines.
And for those of you wanting a little more from the story read the phrase “life isn’t very exciting dear”, how about reading it backwards?
reading it backwards......how does it contibute?....... yep......beautiful piece of creative writing.....mashallah!
Well, the Devil obviously represents "evil." Through that representation, life - if lived the wrong way - isn't every enjoyable ("Life Isn't Very Exciting Dear"). I can't really explain it better than that...basically the presence of evil (aka the Devil) only brings about sadness and destruction.
Post a Comment