Tuesday, February 10, 2009

How long before you get back to reality?

Okay, so its been a really long time since this blog has thoughts added to it but that is definetly not the point of this blog. I have these thoughts and you know how sometimes you are just simply sure of something its the same this time except its not absolutely solid and i need it to be becuase its for a friend. 

     So she has the usual incomplete love story where they were together for sometime and it was beautiful and then one day suddenly he e-mails her ( OMG ! ) saying "Thank You" for all that they had and hopes that she will find someone better to spend the rest of her life with! ( WTF??? ) They still keep talking like nothing had happened for you know how long .... 1 day ... 24  hours and just like that within 48 hours he detached himself from her and all that they had for so long. Fine, typical story and trust me that's not the problem. So not all love stories necessarily work out right? okay fine so this didn't? He moved on, is fine now, flirts with other girls and hardly treats her like she exists. Okay, he broke up with her so its obvious. Is that the problem? No! Its the Girl! She just can't get over it! I mean i know its going to be hard and this is her first love and yeah all that lovey-dovey stuff happened but c'mon now the relationship was less than a whole semester, or a little more than that but the point is given that she wasn't even 18 when this happened she hardly saw any of it! I mean its not the end of the world! 

         Okay so don't get me wrong but its been like what more than 1 year now and its about time she got over it! He obviously got over it and is actually doing hwat he is supposed to be doing at this point of time, study, hang out with friends, watch movies, socialize everything that a normal person would do. But all she can do is sulk about it and whine that "i didn't see him today!" or "Oh lets go look for him c'mon!" or "Omg i hate you for making me think about him!" or at the least mention of something bad about him "HEYYYYYY! Don't say that about him. He is not bad! He is so cute! You have no right to say that! " :O Hello focus here we probably didn't say anything but something like " Omg he is so freaky , he always wears that same shirt! " And then there are times when she does see him. At first she's looking all around for him and then when she sees that he is just ahead she starts fidgeting and makes a big commotion which makes him aware of her approach and then just as she hopes for a smile and a "Hi" from him, she sees the otehr person beside him who happens to be any random girl  he is talking  to, and guess what happens ... She starts fuming! She starts and doesn't end until she goes to bed! " He this.. He that  " " She this ... She that " And most of the this and that is not polite enough to be on here! 

     So In a sentence her problem is that she cannot accept the fact that although they had "good times" a long time ago, he is just not that into her now!. Where's my problem in it? I can see my friend ruining herself in this process! She doesn't give her best in anything that she does because she spends a huge percentage of her time day-dreaming about him! She gets upset over silly things like i got to see him and she didn't or he passed by and pretended like she was just another piece of furniture! It hurts me to think of how much she can put with this and how much longer can i stand this?  
  
    I tried. I told her he wasn't worth being with her, she got mad at me! I told her there are a thousand other guys who are better than him and she deserves to be with one of them, she stopped talking to me! I told her that although you guys had something special it was real while it lasted, now its nothing more than last week's stale bread. You have to get over past and live in the present! She said it was the most real thing possible and that there was nothing more to love that what she had seen! I mean is that even possible? I told her of the couple who have been married 51 years now and still say that there's so much more to love that they haven't seen! I told her that at the present there were too many other things that were real. She is a girl! Gone are the days when a girl's only identity was the man she was with! No that's not the same anymore! Girls now are independent and free! They don' habe to deal with stuff like this anymore not this young anyways! You know what she said " No a girl still needs a man in her life without which life is incomplete " ??? so i said " You have your father and brother .... " There is no arguing with her! 

    I need some one to tell this to her, I need to make her realize her worth! I just don't know what to do with her! 


2 comments:

Anonymous said...

u seem very frustrated with this.. i think its the longest blog entry we have:p

nyways so.. its very hard to deal with girls in these situations.. becuz theres much more to it than i saw him and he did this and that.. its all wats goin in her head.. its not that she thinks hes awesome.. its that she daydreamed about him so much and in soooo many different situations that she had created a perfect image for him in her head and now she belivs it and is stuck with it.. and wat makes it harder for her is that "he" is the one that ended it.. so he is in the more powerful position in her mind..

the solution is for her to realise that he is not all that.. not all the stuff she thinks he is in her "24/7-him" head.. and gud luck with tryin to make her stop.. shes so young and stuck in the fairy-tale... im assuming she needs to get the attention of some new "more perfect guy" to get out of this one.. and the cycle will continue...

who r u emzgurl? random "thot that counts" blog lover or some1 we know?:p

~EmzGurl~ said...

Hey Anonymous ... :P

I cam back to this blog and was reading it since i was almost on the verge of postin something but when i read this entry i didn't realize it was mine and didn't see your comment!

It was exactly what i did .... thank you for understanding... she is so much better now ... no that is an understatement, She is awesome now!

Let me update you: She got over him with a very much required closure, she totally broke off the image he had created in her mind of herself. She still can't help herself slip once in awhile and chats with him like nothing else in the world matters but she has eye out for better guys who respects her and appreciates her and never underestimates her.

Heck she could do with an understanding guy like you ... but then you might be taken for all i know.
The point is she is happy and moving on to better things and i learnt two extremely important things from this
1) We are not necessarily ready yet for handling such emotional maturity but when the time is right,God sends his support in ways that we might not be able to decipher.
2) you realize who your true friends are when you are hardly aware of your own true identity. They are the people who will do anything to bring you back, stand by you through thick and thin, even though they might be anonymous like you, but they stand by you, no matter what!

You might know me, i might know you, but if you are anonymous here, how could it matter? But i def love the thought that counts blog!
Thank You, once again!